It seems as if everyone wants to shit on me lately, even someone I considered a close friend. No one can respond to the whole, they always have to fixate on one small part of the whole and then try and make me feel bad about it...fuck that. I don't need that kind of shit. Everyone can just go fuck themselves for all I care.
Life is fleeting...joy, even more so. So why do we go on? More importantly, why do I go on? In the midst of continued and unabated failures, one right after the other, why do I even bother. I'll tell you why, because I'm to scared to try and kill myself, afriad that I will fail and everyone will know how sick I am. Death, and only death, is eternal, at least for the body. My soul will go on and it will live again in another body, and maybe, just maybe, it will succeed at something. Until then, I face the grim future of failing at everything I do. Maybe that isn't such a grim future, I know I am going to fail, so why try? I would love for nothing else if I could become the most worthless member of society, at least I'm heading down that road pretty successfully. Ironic, isn't it. The one thing I'm actually good at is failing. Maybe I should fail more often, one can never get too pessimistic.